


The Day the Music Died

by InsertCleverUsernameHere



Category: Iron Man - All Media Types, Marvel, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: A Little Humor?, Alternate Universe - Teenagers, Angst, Cancer, Character Death, Doctor Who References, Loki is a princess, Loss, M/M, More angst, So much angst, Terminal Illnesses, Tony Feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-14
Updated: 2014-02-14
Packaged: 2018-01-12 09:27:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1184599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsertCleverUsernameHere/pseuds/InsertCleverUsernameHere
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"They meet in the summer.  It's warm and green and it smells like rain that day, Tony will never forget.  As long as he lives, he will never forget."</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Day the Music Died

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry.

They meet in the summer. It's warm and green and it smells like rain that day, Tony will never forget. As long as he lives, he will never forget.  
He doesn't know his name at first, the beautiful boy under the weeping willow. He's reading every time Tony sees him looking up occasionally at the boys playing rugby in the grass. Tony would have played, and he used to, but if he does he'll get winded, and he'll start coughing, and it'll turn to blood. He doesn't want him to see that. The boy's eyes land on Tony one day, greener than he's ever seen even from this distance. They look away after a moment that's far too short, and Tony feels his face burning but he smiles.  
He's there the next day too, which isn't surprising. In the week or so Tony's been here, he's learned that The Middle of Nowhere, Washington lacks a pool or any alternative and so the park's the only place you can really go. A tall blond guy is with him some days. He plays rugby with the others, but he comes over and talks to the green-eyed boy every so often. When they speak, they both smile, the blond-haired one more than his friend and the smile doesn't quite reach his eyes. They don't look related. And that guy's easily three times Tony's size.  
But what does he have to lose? Not a fucking thing.  
Once Blondie's gone, he comes over to the tree and sits down.  
"Hi."  
No answer. He's reading The Lord of the Rings.  
"Good book."  
A nod.  
"I'm Tony," he offers.  
Nothing.  
"Uh... okay... do you have a name?"  
"Maybe."  
"You talk!" he says, only half-joking. "So, um... that guy you were talking to - "  
"To whom you were talking."  
Tony smiles but the boy's not looking. His hair forms a curtain in front of his face (it's just as dark as it looked from the distance) and Tony has to stop himself from pushing it back. "Right... that guy to whom you were talking. He's your... boyfriend?"  
He looks up, shoots Tony a glare that is pure venom. "My brother."  
"Oh. Right. Sorry. Good, I guess?"  
He raises an eyebrow. "Good?"  
"Yeah... uh... so, what about your name?"  
"What of it?"  
Tony can't help but grin a little at how old-fashioned this boy is. "Are you going to tell me now?"  
He smirks and it's possibly the most attractive thing Tony's ever seen. "Why should I?"  
"Because life is short and you are hot." Too short, he thinks. Far too short.  
A pause, and Tony wonders if he's just said something worse than usual. "Did you just quote Doctor Who at me?"  
"More or less."  
He smiles slightly. "I like that."  
"Your name?"  
"Loki."  
"Nice name."  
The boy - Loki - rolls his eyes. "You mock me."  
Tony brings his hand to his heart in mock offense. "Would I?"  
"Yes."  
"Fair enough." He feels a coughing fit coming on and he tries to stifle it but he's already coughing, harsh and barking and ow oh look there's the blood in the Kleenex he's pulled out of his pocket just in time. Loki's looking at him with almost concern in his eyes and Tony doesn't want his pity, doesn't need his sympathy or anyone's really. He'd like to think that he doesn't need anyone, full stop, but Loki's gorgeous and he got his reference and love is on his bucket list anyway. The fit passes and he sits up, jams the tissue in his pocket.  
"Are you contagious?" Loki asks warily.  
"No. I'm fine, don't worry about it."  
"I wasn't going to."  
"Harsh."  
He shrugs and Tony can't help but smile.  
"I like that ice princess thing you've got going on."  
If looks could kill. "Princess."  
"Of course."  
"You're impossible."  
"It's part of my charm, sweetheart." He winks, almost laughing when Loki goes scarlet and hides in his book.

Three days pass and Tony realizes how long that is for him, how little time he has left. He won't see snow again, not really, because he probably won't live to Christmas and it's Washington anyway, too close to the ocean to snow all that much. And on the off chance Loki's batshit crazy enough to have any interest whatsoever, it wouldn't last, it couldn't last. The c-word scares people. They don't want to stay, they don't want to see that. Death is terrifying. So he doesn't tell him. He's a coward but he tries to enjoy this while he can, before Loki figures it out and turns tail. They meet under the same tree, sitting closer each day until their legs touch and he could hold Loki's hand if he had the guts. They talk, only that, about books mostly but also art and movies and the places Tony will never go. He learns that Loki reads philosophy, that he prefers cats to dogs, and that he writes, among other things.  
"Can I read some of your writing?" he asks.  
"Maybe. Someday."  
He tries to ignore the little pain that stabs his heart, that doesn't hurt that doesn't hurt that... hurts.

His brother comes over one day, asks "Who's this?" like Tony's a wanted killer instead of a kind polite um... an interesting guy who just happens to have the hots for his brother.  
"Tony Stark," he says, standing with some difficulty and shaking his hand.  
"Thor Odinson. This is my brother."  
"He told me."  
He narrows his eyes, probably trying to decide whether or not Tony's making a joke at his expense. Loki laughs not-so-silently behind them. He's stood up as well, Tony notices, and he steps forward as if to protect him. He seems so delicate that Tony forgets how tall Loki is sometimes.  
"He's all right, he's nice enough."  
Thor seems to back down, but refuses to take his eyes off Tony. "Do not hurt him."  
"Yeah, sure, man."  
"Good." He reluctantly goes back to the group of athletic-looking guys and periodically glances at Tony the rest of the day.

The next day Loki asks him if he'd like to walk. Tony agrees, and tries to hide how winded he is, and how grateful he is when they find a bench in what Loki calls a fairy garden. It's beautiful, delicate flowers arching overhead and windchimes tinkling in the breeze, but he has to admit that the statues creep him out. He calls attention to this.  
"Oh, no, they're safe. I fixed them ages ago."  
"Fixed?"  
He points to one fairy. "This one's got her eye on him, who's watching that one and so on."  
Tony smiles and Loki turns a little pink. He's adorable and their hands are millimeters apart on the bench so Tony does it, something he'd normally dismiss as nothing - shifts so his hand is covering Loki's. Shit, he's freezing.  
"Ice princess," he recalls, and they both burst into giggles. Tony's able to keep from coughing this time, swallowing the tickle that will kill him and he's reminded that they have weeks at best before Loki gets scared.  
"Tony, I - "  
"I - "  
They speak at the same time and smile at each other like shy little kids. Loki starts again, not looking at Tony.  
"I really like you. A lot."  
Tony takes Loki's chin in his free hand and brown eyes lock on green. "I want to see your face when you talk. It's a really nice face."  
"I..."  
He slides his hand around to the back of his neck, under the hair he's found to be inhumanly soft. Loki shivers (the weather's taken a turn, but somehow Tony doesn't quite think it's because of the chill) and scoots closer, lacing their fingers together.  
"I like you too. Very, very much."  
Loki nods and when he speaks again his voice is softer than usual. "Can... I think I need a hug."  
Tony thinks his heart might melt. He wraps his arms around him and feels Loki's heart beating as steadily as it will for years and years, holds him as tight as the feeling in his chest - not the one that means the c-word but the one that's just as painful because he cares.  
"Hey. Sweetheart. What's up?" he asks after a long moment of just them, of Loki's arms around his waist and Tony's hand in his hair. Loki pulls away to answer the question and Tony sees he's been crying.  
"My... it's my father."  
He brings him back to his chest, trying to protect him. "I'm sorry... do you want to talk?"  
"No... just - don't let go, please."  
So he doesn't. And Tony realises that if they could stay like this forever, here in this garden holding each other exactly like this, he would give anything. Anything for this, always, or at least his always. That wasn't long but it would have to be enough. He feels like he might cry but he hasn't cried in months, not since the word terminal came into his life. He swore he wouldn't.  
They stay like this for a while, Tony loses track of time but it's long enough that Loki's gone and melted into him and Tony gets the feeling that if he pulled away they'd both fall over. He smiles against the top of Loki's head and feels the other's arms tighten. Tony notices how tiny Loki is, definitely not short but tiny, almost frail.  
"He isn't proud of me," Loki says in a low voice that's nearly a whisper.  
"Your dad?"  
He nods.  
"Why not?"  
"I'm not..." Loki speaks slowly, deliberately, as if he's never put it into words for anyone else. Maybe he never has. "I'm not what he wants me to be." Tony stays quiet, lets him talk. As close as they are, he still has to strain to hear the words falling hesitantly from his mouth. "He expects me to be just like him, to grow up and study business and come back to this miserable town and be second-best in his equally miserable company."  
It is here that Tony realizes, really realizes with startling clarity, how different they are. Loki will graduate high school and go to college and have a career and maybe get married someday. And Tony will never do any of that. He pushes the thought out of his head because no, he is not going to become bitter.  
"What do you want to do?" he asks. Loki shrugs and mumbles something he can't quite catch. "Hey, you know I'm not going to give you any shit about this, right?"  
He nods. "I know... remember how I told you I write?"  
"Mhm."  
"I kind of want to do... that. Novels."  
Tony smiles. "Then do."  
"Thank you," he says, and Tony's heart hurts. He will never read one of Loki's books.  
"Any time, princess."

**Author's Note:**

> Shall I continue?


End file.
